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realised i have this weird habit

Ureshii koto wo kakenai kedo, kanashii koto toka iraira suru koto toka kaku yo.
Demo katta no ato ha kimochi ga yokunattekuru dakara yappari kaku.

Mata kareshi to kenta shita yo. Nandaka saikin ha kenta bakari shita.
Konkai ha atashi ha baka mitai de, kareshi wo matteta.atashi no kimochi ga zenzen mushi shite, paati he itta. Sore ha kamawanai kedo, atashi to issho ni kaeri ki mo naku na no ni, "ato de issho ni kaerou" to ichatta. Sore ha iia da.

Kare ni toshite, atashi ha nani?

Am i really making the right choice? If so, my little fairytale world is so disillusionised that I dunno what to do anymore. Whoever that says that life is full of fun must be kidding me
I can't wait for this life to end.

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